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It's not often that I am influenced in a way that impacts my life in a big way...but every once in a while I am challenged to look a little deeper, dig a little harder, and get excited about discovering the truth. (I like to think of it as God knocking at my door really loudly and getting my attention.) It's nice to be able to share something positively on my blog for a change. Weren't you tired of the hum drum?!?
About a month ago on a whim my dad and I decided to check out a new church. I had expressed to him in the past that I was disenchanted with the churches of today and how I felt that I either did not measure up or fit in to todays church mold. I felt like I wasn't being true to myself because I felt like I had to paint this pretty picture perfect Christian Life in order to honour God and my fellow Christians and not make them look bad.
Well I could not live up to that expectation (albeit some of it was my own and I had let myself down.) I was embarrassed that I did not fit the typical mold. I suffered from depression, I had and still do have many hurts, struggles, and bitterness; I did not feel life was worth living despite the hope I was suppose to have. I felt like a failure because I lacked the passion that people had for their faith; I never had this mind blowing spiritual awaking/experience with God that some people had.
I thought there was a formula I had to figure out and perform in order for me to be in the right place for God to make a connection with me, and that because I could not figure this out I was not loved or valued by God. The expectations were to high.
So I stopped going to church. I directed my bitterness and anger at God. I did not lose my faith and what I believed but I secluded myself from Christian people. I sank deeper into my depression. I lived each day in despair and desperation with out any hope for tomorrow.
I don't know when things started to change. Perhaps it was one of those long nights when I bitterly called out to God to change things...prove that He was bigger than all of my pain. I was not going to live another day like the day before. He some how gave me the courage to speak up and start asking for help from family members...which led to my dad speaking up about it to other friends of the family...who in turn, invited us out to THE MEETING HOUSE.
I agreed and decided to go one Sunday morning. I went with no expectations. I was very pleasantly surprised and amused when the sermon started with a film clip from Monty Python. Oh and it is held in the Silver City Movie Theater in Ancaster with Satellite broacasting from the Oakville site.
I sat silently in disbelief as almost all of my thoughts and insecurities were addressed as if the teaching Pastor Bruxy Cavey were speaking directly to me. Even some of the terms used by Bruxy were humorous terms that the average joe would not get...such as Bruxy using the word "symbology" instead of symbolism (which if you did not watch Boondock Saints (over and over again like me) you would not have picked up on the inside joke of the word.)
So God met me right where I was...with all my hurts, all my bitterness, and all my cynicism in a way that I can relate...through humor, sarcasm, creativity, intellect, and love.
I wouldn't say my life has been turned upside down. I am still me...I still have many things to deal with, lots of anger and frustration. They just aren't a stumbling block anymore or a barrier for me to connect with God. I can call out to him despite my circumstances. He will meet me right where I am. I don't have to be ashamed or embarrassed.
And if that means I am having a day and don't want to face the world on a Sunday...I can still "have church" at home and be challenged. And so I challenge you as well...don't take my word for it...check out a pod cast yourself online in the comfort of your own home. But be warned, you may laugh out loud. You may be entertained. You may be challenged to think and not take things at face value.
SO...here are a few links to get you started:
http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=143889873
(This link WILL OPEN up your iTunes to the podcast download page. You will need to hit the SUBSCRIBE button at the top of the screen to enable you to download the episodes.) Download the file with the M4V extension for the lesson.
These are video Pod Casts so I also suggest NOT USING iTunes as it will suck the life out of your computer and make the video choppy so for the sake of humanity if you do not already have it download, install and use VLC Player. It's free and dreamy! CLICK HERE for immediate download.
Apparently you can also live stream the video casts but I have one of those prehistoric computers...but if you don't check out THIS LINK instead. I suggest visiting it regardless because it also contains valuable notes and opening quotes to each sermon as well in PDF format.
Oh an one other thing...if you download a podcast you may have absolutely no idea where the destination file is being downloaded/saved to. I had to do a search because for me it was saved under my Docs/Music/iTunes/Previous iTunes Liabrary/Pod Casts...whats with that.
I suggest you start off with the GOD DEBATE series...a 5 part series as follows:
#1 - Our Common Ground
(Where Christ Followers And Atheists Agree)
#2 - Adventures In Missing The Point
(How Very Smart People Say Very Silly Things)
#3 - The Whys And Why Nots
(Evidences For And Against God)
#4 - Debating Darwin
(Why Evolution Is A Red Herring)
#5 - God And Suffering
(The Best Reason To Believe - & Not To)
additionally the following 2 sermons were added to the block:
#6 - Cleaning Up The Mess
#7 - What Convinced Me
It is cool to mention that at the end of each sermon if time permits, Bruxy opens up the floor for people in the church to ask questions. Another cool thing he does too is on his commute home he records his thoughts and additional things he wanted to say and uploads them as a mp3 Pod Casts. I always find these amusing and a nice follow up addition to the Sermon.
I think it would be really cool that if anyone reading this checks out a Pod Cast that you get back to me and let me know what you thought. Email me at binary.speaking@gmail.com |
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posted by Rachel at